confused

im so confused. i dont even know where to start. my friends are playing like double personalities. all of them, last week they were all fun to hang out with, this week it was torture. even the ones that i felt closest to. it hurts, im like the odd man out in my group, there are hugs going around everywhere!!! but "oh its tyler, we can skip him with the hugs, he wont mind, he's not like everyone else, hes awkward or just weird" really? im so confused, what going on with my life? nothing has gone right for a while. seriously i wonder how death feels compared to this? who would care? would anyone remember me? im so confused. i want everyone to read this. im so confused. i want friends who wont hurt me or just brush me aside. im so confused, im not disposable and yet people treat me like i am, so am i? im so confused