choose

its time to choose. the indecisiveness ends here, it needs to. so choose, there are only two options for you to choose from, wisely or poorly. one way will bless you and be joyful, the other way is painful and pointless the whole way. choose. shouldn't this decision be easy? shouldn't you just pounce on the wise choice? why haven't you then? what's holding you back? can you not see what the indecision is doing to you? its tearing you apart! choose, why aren't you choosing?! come on, its so simple! please, everyone wants you to just choose and just have your life become joyful! please just choose and let all the pain and sorrow leave, to never come back. but you haven't chosen yet, why? you don't want to? why? what could you possibly benefit from not choosing? there's nothing there for you! or is there? is your choice to not choose? is that what you want? its not, but its where you are. you seem like you don't want to move or choose, so it must be where you to be.... its time to choose. there are three options for you to choose from; wisely, poorly, or not at all. choose. what's your choice?

everything

its funny. every single entry i put in, i still know how i felt then, because i still feel the same way

i love you

i love you, i love all my friends, i think we're close friends. if im right, then yes i love you, i truly do. which is why i know you wont take it the wrong way. but hey! do you remember me? of course you do! how could you not? right? you do remember what we've gone through right? wow, guess our friendship needs work, is it my fault? is it yours? no, its not. of course i could be saying that because im too nice. whos fault is it? it needs work, so do i still love you? of course i do! im too nice to not. i cant help it but love you. why doenst everyone love you? you're amazing. oh wait, they do. so does my love count? i mean look at you! you dont need it. im just more icing on the cake. no one needs more dead weight. so i'll just stand to the side and feel happy for you, but stand by myself and love each moment we have together, knowing that it'll soon be over with and you'll be with others who love you too. but i will cherish every moment together, because i do love you, thick or thin, because im too nice. then once you think we've had enough time, and im feeling like this moment can go on forever, you'll leave and i'll be by myself. i tried squeezing my self into your love group. i got shunned and ridiculed. i want to be in it. but its okay, cause i love you no matter what, please count on that. i love you.

do you hate me?

"do you hate me?" i would never hate anyone! you know way to well to think that. "do you hate me?" come on, hate is so strong, everyone gets flustered. "do you hate me?" listen to me! hate is so strong! i cant! "do you hate me?" what is hate? is it anger? jealousy? or just pure loathing? "do you hate me?" gosh, anger, jealousy, all the things that i do feel... i dont loathe you, but if hate is anger and jealousy.... do i hate you?

leave

i just want to leave. not tell anyone, dont give any clue to where i am. just leave. who would do something? not alot. maybe people would notice, maybe, but do something about it? thats out of the question. just let me leave.

tonight

honestly, tonight sucked. i was excited about the night, hanging out adn just having fun. but i got jealous, mad, idiotic, and just more worse of a person because of tonight. tonight. im glad time occurs so we have to move on. cause i just wanna get through all the crap im dealing with right now.

true friendship

its funny how my true friendships with people are usually hidden. are they embarressed about it? thanks. that makes me feel great.